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So what’s holding you back from moving forward more quickly towards your goals? Likely you are reading this article because you want to learn something. You want to learn something that you can apply to your life or business, so that you can grow and move forward more quickly. You likely have goals that you have not achieved. One of the keys to moving forward will be to find out what is holding you back.

This is a question I ask myself from time to time. While I am making exciting progress towards many of my goals, there are some that I am not moving forward on as quickly as I would like. Self examination helps me look at these areas and ask: “What’s holding me back?”

While everyone will have unique factors that hold them back, there are a few things that many people have in common. Here are the things that most likely are holding you back.

1. No Clear Picture of the Destination

If you don’t have clarity about what you are trying to accomplish and where you are trying to go, you will not make significant progress. This is more than simply writing down a goal. It is having a crystal clear picture for what achieving this goal will be like. The difference is like the difference between a black and white photograph and a high definition video. Most people have goals that are like the black and white photograph. You know what you want, but you don’t have a vivid picture of it. Dream a little. Use your imagination. Turn that black and white photograph into a color photograph. Then dream some more and turn it into a movie. Then dream some more and turn your movie into vivid high definition. Your dream will have increased clarity and you will have more passion to move towards it.

2. You Don’t Know WHY

Another thing that might be holding you back is that you don’t know your WHY. Your WHY is the motivating reason behind the goals. It is the reason why you will spend extra time and effort working towards the dream. The WHY is not the dream itself, but all the reasons WHY you want to achieve the dream. The WHY is usually outwards focused – on the difference you can make for others, or the difference it will make for your family. Make sure you know your WHY clearly.

3. Self-doubt

This is a big one. It was the big one in the past for me, is still the biggest one today. While with success comes more and more self-confidence the self-doubt is still there, it is just in different forms. Self-doubt is the voice in your mind that limits you – that says you can’t achieve it, that suggests you won’t make it, that you don’t have the skills and that it won’t work. Self-doubt causes you to focus on your weaknesses rather than your strengths. Self-doubt is a deadly poison for people working towards a big goal. If you let this limiting belief take over you will slow down and stop pursuing your dreams. You need to recognize self-doubt as an attitude that you can control. Focus on your strengths, and remind yourself that you can achieve your goals. Have a support system around you and train them to give you positive reinforcement about your abilities and strengths.
Bonus article: Six Steps to Defeating Self-doubt

4. Lack of consistency

Pursuit of a goal requires consistent effort. While there are times when a focused spurt can be valuable, in general it is much more effective to work at something continuously over time.  Consistency helps you to maintain steady growth. The best way to improve your consistency is to have clear goals that you break down and pursue on a weekly basis and that you break down into daily activities. (For one example, see my weekly planning and goal setting system).

5. Procrastination

Everyone struggles with procrastination. Anytime you put off doing what you know you should be doing you are procrastinating. It is something that controls many of us more than we even realize. The more you are able to move past procrastination the more quickly you will reach your goals in every area of your life. Often people procrastinate on what they view as the little things; however these little things soon add up to become very big things. Procrastination occurs when you take your focus off the importance and benefit of doing the task at hand. When you do this, the negative aspects of the task appear larger than the benefits, and then you won’t do it. You need to focus back on the benefits of what you are doing. Often it helps to just get started, even doing a little. Once you are in the state of action, more action will easily follow.

So what’s holding you back? Is it one of these five things? Is it all of them? Is it something else? Take this opportunity to do a proper self-examination. Understand what is holding back, and work towards eliminating these.

Written by:
The Success Professor – Danny Gamache

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First impressions are very important. Research shows that people often make lasting decisions about you in less than a second. For others it may take a few minutes.  In almost every case when you meet someone they will make up their mind about you early on in your first meeting. That means it is vitally important to make a good first impression, and you need to be prepared to do so. Here are some ways to make a good first impression.

1. Smile

In most cases the first thing that people will see is your face, so be sure you are smiling.  Few things in life are as compelling and inviting as a smile.  Smiles make people feel like you are warm, friendly and inviting.  Smiles are contagious.  Your smile will lead others to smile. People are smiling are generally happy, and if they are happy around you there is a better chance you are making a great first impression.

2. Give a good handshake

A lot of people make judgments about people by their handshakes.  This is especially true in many business relationships.  There is a belief that your handshake speaks about your character.  One thing it really clearly reflects is your confidence. You want to appear to be a confident individual, so shake hands like you are.  That means giving a strong firm handshake.  Shake hands with purpose, knowing that it is one way to show that you are worth knowing.

3. Remember names

Remembering names can be very challenging.  A lot of people struggle with remembering the names of people that they meet.  Thankfully, remembering names is a skill that you can learn.  You can practice remembering people’s names, develop tricks to help you, and you will get better at remembering names. One simple trick is to repeat the name back once or twice in the first minute or two of the conversation.  You may also want to putt a mental picture of the person with the name, adapting it to be something very memorable or so that you think of someone else with the same first name.

4. Establish rapport

Rapport is the connection that you have with another individual. When you are in rapport you are really “with” the person you are talking to.  Some refer to it as being on the same wavelength. It often happens unconsciously when people have similar interests or are in a positive discussion.  There are ways to increase rapport. Salespeople use these to help connect with their prospects, and you can use them to help you build a great first impression.  The techniques are simple things such as maintaining eye contact, mimicking basic body language or breathing patterns.

5. Show interest in them

People appreciate people who are interested in them.  Remember no one is more important to the person you are speaking to than she is to herself.  Show interest in them by asking questions and getting to know them. Look for common interest areas and then focus on asking more questions to them about it. Often the people that will have the best first impression of you are the people who you ask the most questions of.  Get them talking about themselves rather than you and people will be more impressed.

6. Dress well

Be sure to always be well dressed and well groomed.  In other words take care of your appearance. This doesn’t always mean being dressed in a fancy suit or even a shirt and tie.  You just need to look good in what you are wearing. You also need to be dressed appropriately for the venue.  If you are at a business meeting dress professionally – don’t wear jeans or a t-shirt.  Likewise, if you are going to a neighborhood summer party, wear a good pair of shorts and a golf shirt.  You still want to look your best, but be appropriate.

7. Have good posture

Good posture is about how you carry yourself.  Stand upright don’t slouch or slump your shoulders. If you are sitting, sit up with your back against the chair. Carry yourself in a professional and confident manner and people will view you as professional and confident.

8. Have a positive attitude

The last tip may be one of the most important.  Have a positive attitude.  Be happy, and think the best of the situation.  Be a glass half full rather than a glass half empty kind of person. Look for the best of the situation and of the individual you are speaking with. People are attracted to positive friendly people, and so being positive will help you make a great first impression.

While all of these can come across as techniques, they can eventually become just part of who you are. You can become the type of person who naturally makes good first impressions and who others naturally want to be around and be connected to. Use these tips to start but work on developing them into habits.

Written by:
The Success Professor – Danny Gamache
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